When I was around
eight years old, my father took me out shooting for the first time.
Pistols at the break of dawn in some deserted field-turn-shooting
range with flimsy cardboard targets and empty bullet casings
scattered all about the ground. This memory has little to do with how
my life has unfolded so far, but it is just one of many times when my
father impacted my life in a meaningful way, just by showing that he
cared.
I am a 22 year old
soon to be graduate of the Grady College of Journalism. Over the past
two years I've written, learned and been made to question. But after
a year-long internship with a small music blog from Atlanta, I
decided I didn't want to be a journalist. Still I struggle with this
epiphany. Regardless, I decided I would finish my degree and after
graduation dedicate my time to pursuing my real passion: music.
When I was fourteen
I started being serious about the instrument of the guitar. I
practiced everyday until it became almost as natural as breathing. I
could always pick up the guitar and let the day melt away. But being
a musician wasn't enough, so I decided to emulate a full band using
computer software and began singing in the school choir to improve my
voice. Over time I became good enough to write and record songs that
were almost as good as what my contemporaries were doing
professionally (at the age of 18, nonetheless). But music was never
an option for me when I came to UGA. At least, not on the surface.
My dad told me that
I needed to have a “fallback,” in case the music thing didn't
work out, so I figured the next best thing would be music journalism.
Through my various internships and local connections, I was able t
meet some of my idols and learned a lot about other genres of music.
But it was always disheartening to know that at the end of the day I
would be thousands of dollars in debt for a degree that I didn't
really want.
So I've persevered
in my field of passion and my field of academia. I've written five
albums in three years, earned a certificate in Music Business from
the Terry College of Business, gathered 5,000 twitter followers using
targeted marketing strategies, filmed music videos and performed live
a number of times. The critics may not always like me (and they
usually don't), but I like my music more than anyone else's. I listen
to my latest album everyday in my car stereo, on my iPhone (which I
am super lucky to have. You know how many people in other countries
don't even have phones?) and on my home stereo. On top of that I
subscribe to Spotify so I can listen to new music from other artists
everyday. I am constantly discovering and analyzing new music. Making
it a part of my life, a part of my music, sometimes, and a part of
who I am. I've dealt with my endless mind-games and those nasty
emotional past-traumas that everybody has – another thing I've
learned from meeting people in college – through my art. What could
be more important than that?
I've decided that
my five year plan will lead me to New York. Brooklyn, to be exact.
Something else my father doesn't exactly “approve” of. Or at
least, he thinks it is impractical. Sure, it costs twice as much to
live there, but I've been in Georgia my whole life. I want to get out
and see if it's really like everyone says it is, or if it's exactly
the same as it is here. I want to see things for myself. I'm tired of
being told how the world is. Through coming to college I've been able
to formulate my own ideas about the world, people, culture and our
society. My opinions don't fit into some cookie cutter mold because I
don't want to fit into a mold. I want to be unique and an individual.
I find that thought very enriching.
I notice I haven't
really said anything good about my Dad since that first paragraph.
Well, he's payed my bills and that says a lot, I think. I've spent
his money on books, tuition, food, rent, bills. But I've also spent
it on comics, movies, dates, eating out, electronics, clothes, games
and musical devices. In spite of this, he hasn't cut me off. He
hasn't said “You're no longer my son and I'm no longer taking care
of you.” In spite of our differences, he's been understanding, and
having witnessed families being torn apart by egos and
narrow-mindedness, that's a real good thing.
I've still got a
lot of the same problems that I had when I first came to UGA, but
being here has forced me to find new ways to deal with those problems
that are constructive, rather than destructive. I'm naturally a “the
glass is half-empty”-kind of person, but I'm trying to be a “the
grass is green wherever you stand”-kind of person – which I just
made up, but hopefully that makes sense.
I just lost my
train of thought, where was I? Oh yes, to fund my lifestyle and my
passion for creating music, I plan to stay in Athens until my lease
expires next August. I will hopefully be working at a restaurant,
waiting tables, which I have experience in, until I find a better job
working in Atlanta or New York. But honestly, so long as I am making
better and better music, I don't really care what my day job is. If
it pays the bills, then it's good enough.
I'd really like to
get married someday too, but that's a whole 'nother story and I'll
spare you. But I will say that it involves geeks, metal heads,
computers, poetry, comic art, fire spinning, yo-yo contests,
flamethrowers, action movies and lightsabers, so you do the math.
